While I would never have said it this directly, I’ve always thought of myself as invincible. Not as in dodging bullets or stopping speeding trains, but I thought there was nothing in normal life that could harm me. I believed there were no obstacles to my personal well-being I couldn’t overcome by sheer force of will. I was wrong.
For the past six months, I have struggled in my relationship with a friend. Our interactions left me feeling bad about myself. But he wasn’t trying to do this and so I thought I simply needed to control my reaction and asked that he alter how he spoke to me. Neither worked, of course. Kryptonite cannot stop being kryptonite any more than Superman can stop being vulnerable to it. And that is the realization for which I am grateful today.
Kryptonite exists and I cannot will myself to survive it. Sometimes the only solution is to walk away. And so, my friend and I no longer speak. I wish it were different, but it isn’t and I have to accept that. Having been away from my Kryptonite for a few weeks now, the joy is returning to my writing – and laughter will soon follow. Sometimes the only way to win the battle is not to fight it, and I am grateful for having learned this lesson before it destroyed me.